The Best of EFY

My calling in the Young Men's program at church is kind of weird. Most of the time, I don't really need to do anything, except be where the youth are going to be. Today was one of those days. Every year, our stake participates with 8 other stakes in something called "The Best of EFY".

EFY is "Especially For Youth", and is basically a summer camp for youth in the church to attend for a few days to hear speakers talk about gospel topics and to spend time with other fellow youth in the church. It usually happens in the summer, and usually caters to those who live along the Wasatch Front in Utah. However, on a rotating basis, one of the 9 stakes will sponsor a few of the EFY speakers to come to Southern California to visit with the youth and share with them a few topics on a given Saturday. It's rather small in comparison to the real thing, but it is wildly popular to the local kids and they love attending.

Today, our stake sponsored two speakers to come down, and coupled their talks with dinner and a dance, as is tradition. My wife had been asked to lead a youth choir between the two speakers, so she was able to be in attendance through the first talk. We sat together, which was great.

The first speaker, a fellow named John Hilton III, gave a talk titled "Dare Not to Compare". He spoke about how we need to be less concerned about what others have or what we look like. He cited several things that the kids seem to be focused on, such as grades or clothes or makeup. For the boys, they also tend to be worried about who is most athletic or who has the best skateboard or who has the newest gadget.

He shared the story from Matthew 13, about a householder who hires people throughout the day, each for the same wage, and how at the end of the day the ones who labored the longest complained that they didn't get paid more than those who arrived at the end. This he likened to the "It's not fair!" syndrome that is so easy to identify with. Each of the laborers had happily agreed to the terms of the work and the compensation to be received, yet at the end of the day, those who saw what others had received for their work felt that it was unfair. We each would probably feel similarly, but this comparison to others can be destructive.

He also said that pride can also lead to unwise comparisons. When we compare ourselves to those who may be "below" our standing, we often fail to realize that less is often expected of those who have received less, and thus we feel "better" than them. Conversely, when we compare ourselves to those who are "above" our standing, it is easy to fall into the trap of not appreciating those things which we do have because another may have something that is nicer.

A few interesting comments or references he made that I noted:

• If we break the rules, the rules can break us.
  
• The Lord looks on the heart (1 Sam 16:7)
  
• The grass is almost never really greener on the other side.
  
• We should avoid the traps of "can't wait until ...", "I wish I was ...", or "Wouldn't it be great if ..."

He encouraged the youth to not put themselves down, but instead remember who they are as children of God. He indicated that we should each work to build ourselves and others up, rather than wreckers who pull both ourselves and others down. Then he issued a final challenge: we should each try to spend the next 48 hours not comparing ourselves to anybody, and see how that goes. Hmm, interesting!

The second speaker was a man named Hank Smith. He was really quite funny and, ironically, compared his own name as being somewhat unsophisticated to that of the previous speaker, John Hilton III. It was rather silly, and I'm not sure if it was intentional, or just plain ironic, that he would spend the first few minutes of his talk comparing himself to the previous speaker. He also made a joke about how tomorrow, the first Sunday of the month, is going to be fast and testimony meeting, but how it would be totally awesome if there was an "e" in the fast, to make it "feast" and testimony meeting. If that were the case, I'm certain that many people would happily and eagerly pray and "feast" for others' well-being, something a little tougher to do when prayer is coupled with "fasting".

He then began talking about great break-up lines. A few samples:

• We need to talk ... (You always know where that conversation is going ...)
  
• It's not you, it's me. (Ditto.)
  
• Roses are red, violets are blue, trash is dumped, and so are you!
  
• I think it's time you know ... I'm Batman!
  
• How will I know if I want to spend eternity with you unless I date other people?
  
• (This one's to be sent via text.) Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: You!
  
• You're like a lava lamp. Fun for a while, but not very bright.
  
• There's only room for two guys in my life, Ben and Jerry.
  
• (This one is a scripture reference.) You draw near unto me with your lips, but your heart is far from me.

Then he started talking about how, to the culture of the world, you can never have enough. You can never be pretty enough, or rich enough, or smart enough, or strong enough. There is always some way, in the eyes of the world, that you will be found inadequate. Compare this to the Savior, who always accepts us as we come to Him, and "hath purchased [you] with his own blood." (Acts 20:28)

Then he spoke about sacrifice. He shared the story of Abraham and how he really had only one thing that was so special to him that it would be difficult to give up: his treasured son Isaac. And yet it was this that the Lord asked him to sacrifice for Him, not because He needed him or even wanted Isaac to be sacrificed, but because He wanted Abraham to demonstrate a willingness to give up anything that the Lord may ask of him.

In this same way, we are asked to give up things as well. Not our children, as it may be, but instead we are asked by the Savior to give up our sins. The speaker challenged us to find something in our lives that is inconsistent with the teachings of the Gospel and to give it up, whether it be some form of clothing, music, media (pornography especially), energy drinks, moral behaviors, etc.

By giving these things up, we make a commitment to ourselves and to the Lord, hopefully permanently, that we will never do these things again. He shared the story of the Lamanites, who were a bloodthirsty and war-making people, who buried deep their weapons of war once they were converted unto the Lord, and committed that they would never take them up again, even when faced by enemies who would not have mercy on them and would slay them. This kind of commitment to turn our backs on our sins is what the Lord really wants of us.

The speaker reiterated that the Lord does want each one of us, unlike the world that will always find us wanting. He paid for all our sins, and calls us His people. The speaker urged us to not buy into what the world says, that looks are everything, for the world offers nothing but loneliness and sorrow, where the Lord says in John 14:27, "Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid."

Good words.

It was a great evening. Following these two speakers, it was about 6 pm and they sent everybody outside to each sub sandwiches (I had a turkey sub). The youth swarmed the food tables, and there wasn't anything left by the time the dance started at 7:30.

For me, being at the dance was an interesting experience. The last dance of this nature I'd been to was back in college, almost 12 years ago. There, I was with my wife and we most certainly were being goofy. Here, though, I was an "adult leader" (when did I get old enough to be that?!) and expected to monitor the kids.

Truth be told, there wasn't anything for me to do. I'm kind of a mother hen to the boys in my teacher's quorum, though, so I wandered around and challenged each one of them to dance with somebody they normally wouldn't dance with. I'm not sure if they did, as I ended up leaving just after 8 pm (again, there wasn't anything for me to do and there was plenty of adult supervision), but my heart was warmed as I witnessed each one of them out on the floor dancing (and with girls!). One of the boys did arrive late, showing up after the dance started, but he immediately waded into the fray and found people to dance with. I was so proud I was grinning from ear to ear. My boys, dancing with girls!

A few observations, though:

• Teenagers today dance differently than we used to. They gather in groups (even the boys), and don't ever really pair off unless it's a slow dance, and even then sometimes they don't.
  
• It was quite funny to see people flee the room when a slow song started, both boys and girls. (However, each of my boys stayed in the room!)
  
• I'm not familiar with much of the music of today's youth. Apparently much of it was from Radio Disney, or was Miley Cyrus or Taylor Swift, or other young artists.
  
• It was so loud I could hardly understand the words, but the kids were singing along to it and seemed happy.
  
• They raise their hands over their heads when they dance. I don't get the purpose of that.
  
• There was a TON of cute girls there. Being who I am today, I would've been in heaven having all those options to ask to dance with me. However, I get that the boys were shy -- I was, too. What they say is true, "Youth is wasted on the young ..."

All in all, it was a very interesting evening. I am very glad that I went, and I look forward to more of this kind of stuff with the youth in the future.

On Birthday Surprises

My wonderful wife had her birthday a few days ago. I managed to get through it without too much stress, and actually felt pretty good about how it went. For all those who really know me, you know that gift giving holidays of every flavor fill me full of dread. I just hate, hate, hate having to come up with gift ideas for people, and the whole process of going to a store and buying something (or much, much worse, trying to be crafty and make something) is a horrifying experience for me. My dear wife loves me even so.

Nevertheless, as her birthday was approaching, I really wanted to do something nice for her. For her birthday, Christmas, Valentine's day, and anniversary (and I mean this in all honesty) I never fail to unimpress my wife. I have a major problem picking up on the little hints of things that she says that she wants, so it usually comes down to her (I'm totally not making this up) sending me a link on Amazon.com or circling something in a catalog, putting it in front of me, and saying, "I want this."

Because of this, whenever she opens a gift, it's a rarity that she is actually surprised. Usually when she is surprised, it's something that isn't quite right, and either needs to be returned altogether or exchanged for a better fitting model. She loves me dearly, and even with my bumblingness (is that a word? it is now), she always smiles at me, expresses her gratitude, gives me a kiss, and then later I find that she has quietly found the receipt and put the item in a pile of things to be returned.

I've long since learned not to be offended.

Nevertheless, while I struggle with the whole process of gift-giving, I do want to do something special for my wife, and get her something that is not only nice, but that is a total surprise and that she won't return.

This year for her birthday, I ended up with one that fit all three categories, and one that hit two out of the three. I felt pretty good about it, but still wish I'd been able to hit a grand-slam.

The first one I got was a kitchen appliance that my wife had been eyeing for a long time. Anybody that knows my wife knows that she loves cooking and spends a lot of time in the kitchen. She's always looking for new recipes and new things to try, and so I've been hearing that she wanted a hand blender. About a month ago, I went to Amazon.com and looked at her wish list there, and discovered that she actually had one marked that was a reasonable price. I jumped on it and ordered it as soon as I found it.

Well, last weekend, she actually dragged me off to Kohl's to do some shopping. She had a 30% off coupon that she wanted me to take advantage of, and sent me with a short list of a few things to pick up: new slippers (got 'em -- happy unsurprised birthday, honey!) and a hand blender. Hmmm, I wondered, how was I going to get out of buying the hand blender for her while at the same time not telling her that I already had one for her in a box at home? It was a conundrum until I found out the price of the one there ($60), which was more than double the price of the one I'd got online. Knowing the frugal nature of my wife, I figured I could honestly proclaim that I wasn't about to spend 60 bucks on a hand blender for her. I'd come off sounding cheap (which she appreciates, thank heavens!), but it would certainly throw her off the scent.

Bottom line, it totally worked. Come her birthday, she opened it, and was delighted. At first she called me a liar, thinking I'd bought the really expensive one from Kohl's, until she looked at it and realized I'd actually bought the exact one she had on her Amazon wish list. Ah, tricky me! So, even though she had told me to buy it, I still managed to surprise her because she didn't think that I had actually bought it. She's quite happy with it, and has already used it several times.

Now to the second gift.

For months I've been hearing that she wants an MP3 player. She totally expected me to go get her a $15 model from Best Buy or something, but I also knew that she was secretly jealous of the new phone that I got from work (a Droid X -- I absolutely love it! Forget the iPhone, just buy one. You know you want it already! And no, I don't currently own any Google or Motorola stock ... it's that awesome.) She's been watching as I've been downloading apps and playing games and organizing my stuff and she was doing her level best to keep the green envy monster in check, but she totally wanted one. However, I knew she'd be really mad at me if I paid hundreds of bucks to buy her one, nor did I want to monkey with anything that would make our combined telecom bills any bigger.

So, what to do? Then it occurred to me that I have all these frequent flier miles hanging around ... and they have electronics that you can "buy" with them ... and they have MP3 players there ... So, yes, I used my frequent flier miles, which I've been collecting from work travel for almost 10 years, to buy her an MP3 player. But I didn't want the little cheap one. I wanted one where she could download apps, put the scriptures on it, play games, show videos, etc. So, looking through the menu of players they had, I noticed that they actually had an iPod Touch available. I looked at the features, then at my available miles, then at the features again, then I clicked "Add to cart", and it was on its way to my house.

But then she started making my life even more complicated, starting to talk about how she was thinking of getting a new phone that could do more stuff like mine. She was really interested in being able to download apps, have a decent MP3 player in it, etc. She even found some models she could get for free, with certain data plans. There I was, with a gift that would meet her needs literally in the mail, but I couldn't say a word about it for fear of ruining the surprise. Well, Mr. Cheap came to the rescue again: "Honey, I really don't want to pay anything more for our telecom bills. I mean, the data charges alone ...!" It worked, but I could tell she wasn't satisfied. All I had to do, though, was put her off until her birthday. She must've got sick of hearing me say, "You don't need a new phone. The one you've got works fine!" It must've been small consolation for a woman who had download needs, but that's where I was. I don't think she noticed that I found ways to leave the room when the subject came up.

Well, before it arrived, I threatened my wife that she wasn't to pick up (let alone open) any packages that arrived at the house for a few weeks or else ... something. She was a good girl, and did as she was told, and this little box showed up. I'm absolutely certain she figured it was an MP3 player. However, when her birthday came, she unwrapped the box, opened it up, and this look of total confusion went across her face. At first, I'm not sure she knew what it was. Then it dawned on her. Then she got mad at me for spending too much. Then I told her I hadn't spent a dime. Then she got mad at me because it was too much. Then I told her she'd been wanting an MP3 player. Then she insisted it was too much. Then I told her it does everything my Droid does except make calls. Then she opened it and we had some arguments with the kids over who's iPod it was. Finally, a while later, she started smiling.

And all was happy.

Until ...

She asked, "Does this thing have a camera?" My heart sank. No camera?! Of course it has a camera! See, it's right ... um ... Yeah. No camera. I got online and tried looking for the product description again, but it wasn't available anymore. We had a little discussion about how, when she realized what it was, she was really excited to use the built-in camera to take pictures and videos.

I thought maybe they'd sent me the wrong one. I emailed the frequent flier people, who promptly responded with, "As stated in the Terms & Conditions of the program, no exchanges or returns on Apple products are permitted." The person who replied even sent me the invoice with the model number and product description, which clearly said nothing about a camera. Grr. So, I called customer service. Ironically, the person who answered was the same person who sent me the email! How can that be? Seriously? I mean, what are the odds?! And worse, she was absolutely unyielding. No exchanges or returns. Period. And, no, sir, it wouldn't help to talk to her manager because it's in the terms and conditions. Ack.

So, here we are "stuck" with a perfectly good iPod Touch, which is "3rd Generation", which is totally awesome, but now it has the stink of something that just isn't quite right. To add insult to injury, the frequent flier catalog now only has the 4th Generation version, which, of course, has a camera. I missed it by only a week or two. Curse my luck!

And now, here I sit, having given my wife some wonderful gifts that were really nice, a total surprise, and that she won't (or, in the latter case, can't) return. But still I feel strangely unsatisfied about it.

*sigh*

And Christmas is less than 2 months away, and I'm all out of ideas ...

Tribe Names

My daughter was grouped with three other kids into a "tribe" and they are supposed to be making up their own rules and stuff as part of a project. Their tribe name? The "Awesome British Gummy-Bears of Doom". I'd totally join that tribe!

Dangers Right Beneath Our Feet

I had a bad dream last night. I was out in the desert, surrounded by scrub brush and dirt and a lot of people. It was daytime, and we were in a fairly large depression that had been surrounded by earthen walls on four sides. My children were off playing with the other kids, basically running around in hordes and laughing hysterically.

As my children played, I went to go climb one of the walls to see what was on the other side. Just as I rose above the crest, I saw an old F-104 Starfighter amble overhead, largely flipped over so that it was almost top down. Soon, two F/A-18 Hornets screamed by in formation, and I knew they were supposed to bracket the old Starfighter and bank left. One of the Hornets got too close and clipped one of the wings of the Starfighter, which was clearly going to crash.

The pilot of the Starfighter miraculously managed to right the slow-moving plane and do a belly-landing in the soft desert dirt. Nobody was hurt, but the pilot immediately popped the top and started running from the smoking ruin. To my horror, I watched all the children swarm the plane, laughing and climbing on the wings and fuselage, which was starting to smoke more and more. I ran over and started yelling to the children to get away. I was keeping my own distance, knowing that the jet fuel in the plane could explode at any second, when I saw my own two oldest children climb right up on top of the cockpit. Where my two oldest children were, I was sure that my youngest child was sure to follow, but I did not see him.

I started yelling frantically for them to get down off the plane and waved for them to come to me, but they did not hear me and ignored my motions. My daughter, in her innocence, even began waving for me to come to her! Just as I was steeling myself to run in after them, knowing full well that it was going to be futile, I awoke with a start.

Some dreams carry residual emotions with them when you awake, and I retained the fear of losing all three of my children in that horrible accident this morning. I didn't sleep so well after that.

As it was General Conference this past weekend, I've been in a mode of contemplation, and I immediately began to consider the applications of this dream.

First off was the practical: it is simply impossible to warn your children about all the potential dangers that might occur to them in their lives. Seriously, have you ever warned your children that if a plane crash lands in the desert, you shouldn't climb on it because it might explode? (I probably will later today.) That kind of situation just doesn't come up in normal day-to-day life.

We warn them against all sorts of physical dangers: look both ways before crossing the street, don't run with scissors, keep your fingers out of wall sockets, and even brush your teeth really well or they'll fall out someday. At some point, however, children need to start thinking for themselves, and consider for themselves the dangers that there are in this world. For my own children, they seem to have a healthy sense of self-preservation, but not such a good sense of how their actions can injure another. They also haven't shown great wisdom in unfamiliar or unusual settings, such as illustrated in my dream.

So, I ask myself, how do I help my children to recognize dangers that could quite literally be right beneath their feet? Clearly I need to help them to recognize the promptings and direction that can come from the Holy Spirit. My two older children have been baptized and have received the Gift of the Holy Ghost, which means that they have the right to be guided by the Spirit of God at all times in their lives, if they live worthily. I can certainly teach them how to live worthily by modeling and encouraging good behaviors, but how do I, as a parent, teach them how to actually listen to the promptings of the Spirit?

So often my children get so excited about things that they don't stop and think about their surroundings. In my dream, it was quite evident that they were just following the crowd, all in the name of fun and excitement. This put them in a place that was dangerous to them physically. This panicked me, and I was deeply afraid of losing my children.

To draw the comparison, I think that it is all too easy to follow the crowd into places that are not only physically dangerous, but spiritually dangerous. I find myself wondering if my children would be discerning enough to recognize these types of situations, and to avoid them from the beginning. At this writing, I'm not so sure.

The dream certainly shook me, and I now know what we will be talking about during Family Home Evening tonight.

Tick-Tock

I was bringing my youngest son, who is 5, home from karate practice yesterday when I heard his little voice call from the back of the car, "Daddy, why are there tick-tocks in the front and the back?"

Uh, okay. First, I hadn't the faintest idea what a "tick-tock" was, and second, the front and the back of what?!

So, I replied most eloquently, "What?!"

He repeated his question, to which I replied even more eloquently, "Huh?!"

Then he said, "You know, on cars. Why do they have tick-tocks in the front and the back?"

At this point, realization dawned on me that he was asking about the turn signals, otherwise called "blinkers". (Understanding 5-Year-Old = Awesome Dad Moment.)

Thereafter ensued a discussion about how turn signals are put on the back of cars so that people who are behind them can see where the cars are going, and how turn signals are on the front so that people in front of or beside them know similarly. I'm not sure he got it, even though he said he did.

After I had this discussion with him, I was amused, but also fairly sad. Now that I'd informed him what they're really called, I'll probably never hear his cute little voice utter "tick-tock" in the same context again. The term "tick-tock" is sooo much more adorable than what they're really called, and so much more poetic. Such a pity.

Hmm, makes me wonder what other adorable sayings I've completely wrecked in my children's youth, all in the name of precision.

Triathlon

This morning was the big triathlon. It's an annual event sponsored by our stake (I think) and the teachers and priests from all over the area are invited to participate. A few months back, when I was called to be in the Young Men's Presidency, I decided that I wanted to participate as an adult, in order to show some solidarity with the boys. The other two adult leaders with whom I work are athletic, so it made natural sense that the three of us could form a team to participate. The triathlon wasn't a full triathlon, as the swim was "only" 400 yards, the biking was 5 1/2 miles, and the run was about 3 miles. Having just finished training for a 5 k (~3.2 miles), I was quickly able to press the other two into participating with me to do the swim and the cycling.

Then I had my appendix out.

Despite my best intentions and my seemingly quick recovery, the doctor thought that participating in a triathlon that soon after my surgery would be a little too much too soon. When I told my wife the doctor's misgivings, she jumped on the bandwagon and made the directive to not participate even more strict.

So, I had arranged to participate in the triathlon with a team, and suddenly was no longer able to participate. I still am grumbly about that. The other two, bless them, planned to participate and one of them had one of his adult sons fill in for me. (Truthfully, I think he was pretty happy about it, because he didn't want to do the cycling -- his assigned piece of the triathlon -- and his son was more than happy to do it.)

So, instead of my smiling mug here, you get this:

In keeping with my general policy, I won't be naming names on who these people are in this space, but they know who they are. I'm jealous. That was supposed to be my team, but whatever. *pout*

Anyway, the morning started beautifully with nice and cool temperatures that slowly rose as the day went on. By the time the triathlon was finished, the temperature was in the 90s, so it ended well.

All told, we had the two leaders, two other non-leader adults, and 11 boys participate, most of them from the teachers quorum. Four of the boys did an "ironman", running the whole race themselves. And they did great.

I helped get them all registered and ordered and teamed up, and then pretty much just wandered around taking pictures the whole time. It was pretty fun capturing the candid moments. There was this one where the boys were acting cool before the race:

And this one where one of the leaders was posing with his two participating boys for his wife:

And this one where everybody was standing around just waiting for the first leg, the swimming, to start:

My personal favorite is this one where one of the boys was flirting with a few young women who were there:

After each leg, I tried to capture pictures of all the boys as they came out of the water, cycled to the end, or clambered home at the end of the run. By the end, everybody was hot and tired (even the non-racers, like me), and felt a sense of accomplishment.

There was one boy who felt he had let his teammates down, and another who had crashed on his bike during the cycling portion:

Even so, I think most people went home happy. I heard several of the non-racing adults occasionally mutter, "Maybe next year ..." It really did look like fun, though exhausting. If I'm still in my calling next year, I definitely plan to race, maybe even doing it iron man-style! Assuming I don't have to have my appendix out, that is ...

Something That Makes Me Happy

My youngest son loves cars and Legos and trains and anything even remotely related to wheels. He is also five years old, which means that he doesn't naturally clean up after himself. In fact, being who he is, he tends to pretty much drop whatever is in his hands where he happens to be. This means that we regularly find Lego parts and Hot Wheels cars all over the house. As a parent I'm supposed to get annoyed when this happens, but, truthfully, it actually brings great joy to my heart. I love finding these little treasures all over the house, and I know for a fact that one of these days I am really going to miss it.

Insult to Injury

So I'm well enough after my appendectomy to finally go to work. Then I catch the flu.

A Glorious Day!

Okay, so I had to mark today as a Glorious Day. There are certain times in your life when you reach very special and extraordinary milestones, and sometimes we let those times pass. Well, for me, I just had to record it for posterity: Finally, my oldest son has mowed both the front AND the back lawn! A truly Glorious Day!

If Ye Are Prepared ...

It is a mantra that I've applied to my life in many aspects, from being a Boy Scout as a youth to taking finals in college to gathering food storage for my family. The phrase "if ye are prepared ye shall not fear" comes from the Doctrine and Covenants and is found in the midst of a whole pile of instructions to The Church regarding caring for each other.

In the last few days, however, as I've contemplated the appendectomy that I just had, many people have asked me if I was afraid at the time, or if I was worried about it. I can honestly state that never once did I fear for my life during the whole ordeal. I felt truly and terribly awful, for sure, and in the throes of my agony I stated more than once that "I feel like I'm dying!", but never once did I consider that I would actually die.

I do have a healthy sense of self-preservation, though my wife would sometimes disagree when I express my desires to go bungee jumping or skydiving (I'm still forbidden by her, by the way ...). Perhaps I still have an "invincibility complex" that I've never quite grown out of from when I was a teenager. Or perhaps, worst of all, I just simply didn't imagine it was a possibility. (By the way, a failure of the imagination in failure-mode scenarios is a huge no-no at my place of work, and has literally lost spacecraft before.)

Either way, it never occurred to me. I fully recognized at that time that appendicitis was an infection that people used to regularly die from. One of my brothers even had a brush with death because of appendicitis. Even so, I let the nurses knock me out and wheel me off to the operating room with barely a backwards glance to my wife. I said no goodbyes and fully expected to see her within a blink of my eye.

In hindsight, I think I was prepared for the worst, so I never feared it would come. It's like putting fire alarms in your house -- it's a really, really good idea to have them, and pretty much everybody does, but nobody expects to actually need them. Indeed, the only time most people pay attention to them is when the "low-battery tweet" starts to go off at 3 am (why is it always in the middle of the night?!).

My own preparations for the worst include the following, from short-term to long-term:

• I have piles of sick leave available at work. I'm a generally healthy person so this has just accumulated over time.
  
• I can do much of my work remotely, if need be, by computer and by phone, so I didn't worry about being gone for a long time to recover.
  
• I have two very good and reliable wing-men for my calling at church on whom I can wholeheartedly rely for everything.
  
• I have a will that clearly states my beneficiaries.
  
• I have enough life insurance that would pay off all my debts and keep my family in order for several years.
  
• My wife knows where all the important documents are kept.
  
• My wife knows all the important passwords for my online life (financial websites included and especially).
  
• My wife knows where to bury me, if that needs to occur (though we haven't purchased lots, yet -- we still think we're a little young for that and we don't know where life will eventually take us in the long run).

In the midst of all these preparations, my ultimate demise, while a serious blow to my little family, would not leave them uncared for. And while I am certainly nowhere near being perfect, I feel sufficiently comfortable in my religious well-being that the prospect of "moving on" does not fill me with absolute dread.

This is not to say that I feel "ready", not by any stretch of the imagination. Indeed, I still feel like I have so much to do before that eventuality occurs! However, the saying is true: "if ye are prepared ye shall not fear". Trust me, I just tested it.