Tonight I took my oldest son to the L.A. Temple to do baptisms for the dead. It was a great experience, and so my 3 things for my Gratitude List are related to that:
1) I'm grateful for the temple, and the blessings that can be had there, especially those of eternal marriage and eternal families, and that I can be sealed to my dear wife and children (and ancestors) and be with them forever.
2) I'm grateful that my oldest son is now old enough to go to the temple to do baptisms for our ancestors, as it was a great bonding experience between us.
3) I'm grateful that my oldest son is mature enough to appreciate the great work that goes on in the temple, as this means a lot to me that he is beginning to glimpse what that sacred place means to me.
So, there you have it. Note a few things about tonight's entries ... as I write each item, I'm trying to write why these things are important to me personally. This is harder than it looks! Typically, one simply says one is grateful for things, without really saying why. I think this next month is going to be illuminating for me ...
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Monday, November 21, 2011
A Month of Gratitude - Day 1
For Family Home Evening tonight, my wife gave a lesson on gratitude. Even though this is a seasonal topic, it is one that we always need to keep in mind a little more than we do. As part of her lesson, she challenged each member of our family to record three things every night that we're grateful for. I suggested we target doing so for a month, and since this blog is my sort-of-journal, this is where I'm going to record it. So, for the next month, I'll have a blog entry each day with three things listed that I'm grateful for.
So, without further ado, here's my list for tonight:
1) I'm grateful for my wife who is far more spiritually in tune than I am and that she encourages me to be a kinder and gentler person.
2) I'm grateful that my wife provides service whenever called upon to do so, and makes dinner for people who are in need, just like she did tonight.
3) I'm grateful that my wife is grateful for me, because I do not underestimate the importance of spousal validation.
Now, don't think that I'm cheating by always complimenting my wife, as the challenge was to be specific -- none of this "I'm grateful for everything you do" nonsense. So, we'll see how this goes. If I run out of time, or forget a day or two, I hereby commit myself to go back and make it up, so there will be no fewer than 90 items listed by the time I'm done. (You know, when I think of it that way, it doesn't sound like this will be all that hard ... Even so, I think developing a better habit of expressing gratitude is a worthy endeavor.).
So, let the experiment begin!
So, without further ado, here's my list for tonight:
1) I'm grateful for my wife who is far more spiritually in tune than I am and that she encourages me to be a kinder and gentler person.
2) I'm grateful that my wife provides service whenever called upon to do so, and makes dinner for people who are in need, just like she did tonight.
3) I'm grateful that my wife is grateful for me, because I do not underestimate the importance of spousal validation.
Now, don't think that I'm cheating by always complimenting my wife, as the challenge was to be specific -- none of this "I'm grateful for everything you do" nonsense. So, we'll see how this goes. If I run out of time, or forget a day or two, I hereby commit myself to go back and make it up, so there will be no fewer than 90 items listed by the time I'm done. (You know, when I think of it that way, it doesn't sound like this will be all that hard ... Even so, I think developing a better habit of expressing gratitude is a worthy endeavor.).
So, let the experiment begin!
Saturday, November 12, 2011
On Merit Badges
I am an Eagle Scout. I am "proud" of being so for just about as long as it takes for me to remember that if it wasn't for my mother's encouragement, prodding, and not-so-subtle insistence, I wouldn't be one. So it is that I have a fairly long history with the Boy Scouts of America. While a Boy Scout, I went on more campouts than I can remember, attended the National Boy Scout Jamboree at Fort A.P. Hill, Virginia; and even went so far as to keep going with earning merit badges until I had earned an Eagle Palm after getting my Eagle.
That said, I was always on the "scout" side of the Boy Scout program. More recently, though, I've been more involved in the "leader" side of the program. A decade back, I was asked to help with the 11-year-old scouts in my ward, where I was specifically tasked with the objective to help the boys under my charge reach the rank of 1st Class before turning 12. That was my charge, and I took it very seriously. I am once again "proud" of the fact that many of those boys that came under my wing at that time continued to pursue scouting until they, too, became Eagle Scouts. Once again, this pride remains with me only as long as it takes for me to remember that it is the boys who accomplished that feat, not me.
So it is that my oldest son is now formally a Boy Scout, having reached the mighty age of 12. Having completed the requirements for his First Class, he is now entering the wonderful world of merit badges. He has recently been attending some events sponsored by the stake -- something called a "Merit Badge Midway" and other merit badge workshops sponsored on Thursday nights. At these events, he can complete most (if not all) of the requirements for the merit badges he works on. So far he has completed 4 merit badges, and he's only been working on them for a few months.
This mode of scouting, namely the mode where the focus moves away from a checklist of skills to be learned (knot tying, first aid, outdoor cooking, etc.) and instead moves towards earning merit badges, seems to suit him particularly well. It certainly is a much less stressful thing on my wife, who previously was always poking and prodding him to do the tasks for the lower ranks. She is delighted that he is now moving into this realm where he must take more personal responsibility for advancing in rank, and even more delighted that he seems to be up to the task.
As for me, my previous experience with the 11-year-old scouts mostly ended at 1st Class, and I only dabbled in helping the boys earn merit badges, something that at the time I didn't enjoy at all. Now, however, I'm having a great time. As I'm working with the 12- and 13-year-olds as the Assistant Scoutmaster, I am enjoying pretty much everything -- the planning, the training of the boys, the camping, and the encouraging of the boys to get the merit badges. I never thought I'd actually like doing this, and yet I do.
I'm getting a kick out of constantly asking my son, "So, what else do you have to do for that merit badge?" and him responding with a well-timed roll of the eyes and a grumble as he trundles off to get the binder with his merit badge paperwork. I'm of the opinion that these boys should finish with their Eagle before they turn 14, as I recall how difficult it was to finish things up when I was 15-turning-16. Hopefully my son can pull that off, but again, the best part about this whole thing? It's now on his shoulders, not mine.
After all, I already have my Eagle (thanks, Mom!).
(Irony noted ...)
That said, I was always on the "scout" side of the Boy Scout program. More recently, though, I've been more involved in the "leader" side of the program. A decade back, I was asked to help with the 11-year-old scouts in my ward, where I was specifically tasked with the objective to help the boys under my charge reach the rank of 1st Class before turning 12. That was my charge, and I took it very seriously. I am once again "proud" of the fact that many of those boys that came under my wing at that time continued to pursue scouting until they, too, became Eagle Scouts. Once again, this pride remains with me only as long as it takes for me to remember that it is the boys who accomplished that feat, not me.
So it is that my oldest son is now formally a Boy Scout, having reached the mighty age of 12. Having completed the requirements for his First Class, he is now entering the wonderful world of merit badges. He has recently been attending some events sponsored by the stake -- something called a "Merit Badge Midway" and other merit badge workshops sponsored on Thursday nights. At these events, he can complete most (if not all) of the requirements for the merit badges he works on. So far he has completed 4 merit badges, and he's only been working on them for a few months.
This mode of scouting, namely the mode where the focus moves away from a checklist of skills to be learned (knot tying, first aid, outdoor cooking, etc.) and instead moves towards earning merit badges, seems to suit him particularly well. It certainly is a much less stressful thing on my wife, who previously was always poking and prodding him to do the tasks for the lower ranks. She is delighted that he is now moving into this realm where he must take more personal responsibility for advancing in rank, and even more delighted that he seems to be up to the task.
As for me, my previous experience with the 11-year-old scouts mostly ended at 1st Class, and I only dabbled in helping the boys earn merit badges, something that at the time I didn't enjoy at all. Now, however, I'm having a great time. As I'm working with the 12- and 13-year-olds as the Assistant Scoutmaster, I am enjoying pretty much everything -- the planning, the training of the boys, the camping, and the encouraging of the boys to get the merit badges. I never thought I'd actually like doing this, and yet I do.
I'm getting a kick out of constantly asking my son, "So, what else do you have to do for that merit badge?" and him responding with a well-timed roll of the eyes and a grumble as he trundles off to get the binder with his merit badge paperwork. I'm of the opinion that these boys should finish with their Eagle before they turn 14, as I recall how difficult it was to finish things up when I was 15-turning-16. Hopefully my son can pull that off, but again, the best part about this whole thing? It's now on his shoulders, not mine.
After all, I already have my Eagle (thanks, Mom!).
(Irony noted ...)
Monday, October 24, 2011
An Interesting Night
Here's the rundown of my evening:
- Got home from work.
- Played Lego Indiana Jones with my youngest son.
- Had dinner with the family.
- Watched a Charlie Brown cartoon with the kids (It's Magic, Charlie Brown).
- Skipped soccer practice for my daughter because she's not feeling well.
- Read Harry Potter to all 3 kids, who were paying rapt attention.
- Put the kids to bed.
- Couldn't find the cat, so I spent the evening walking the neighborhood calling for her like an idiot, posting signs all over the place, only to have her show herself right when I walk through the door in exhaustion. Then I had to go out again and take down all the signs. Glad we found her, but ... Stupid cat.
- Now my wife is downstairs blow-drying the bread she made tonight. (Don't ask.)
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Geobraking
I was reading an article on some of the progress made when studying the samples from the Genesis spacecraft. One sentence made me snort (yes, actually snort):
On September 8, 2004, the spacecraft's sample-return capsule came to rest in the Utah desert after executing what might euphemistically be described as a geobraking maneuver when the parachute failed to deploy.
I'm well-acquainted with aerobraking, having helped with the aerobraking operations for both the Odyssey and MRO spacecraft, and as I was actually in Utah watching the Genesis return (see here) when it performed this so-called geobraking maneuver, this new word just made me laugh.
Gotta love it.
On September 8, 2004, the spacecraft's sample-return capsule came to rest in the Utah desert after executing what might euphemistically be described as a geobraking maneuver when the parachute failed to deploy.
I'm well-acquainted with aerobraking, having helped with the aerobraking operations for both the Odyssey and MRO spacecraft, and as I was actually in Utah watching the Genesis return (see here) when it performed this so-called geobraking maneuver, this new word just made me laugh.
Gotta love it.
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
On Adopting Another Child
So, we've elected to adopt. This isn't a new thing for us ... we've actually been contemplating and researching this for several years. My wife's brother adopted a baby boy twelve years ago through LDS Family Services when they believed that they couldn't have any children after their first son was born. (And there they now are with two more biological children, for a total of four! Go figure.) Having watched their lengthy and sometimes painful experience, we have no illusions about how easy this whole process will be.
Even so, we feel that it is something we should do. Our family of three children, which is wonderful and which we greatly appreciate and love, just doesn't seem ... complete. There's no way to really describe it and -- for those who aren't in tune with their spiritual sides this won't make any sense -- we have felt for a long time that our family should have at least one more child. We're open to two more children, if that's how the adoption process works out, but we'll be happy with just one more.
Our children are delighted at the prospect. Our daughter, in particular, is keen on having a little girl join our family, but she knows that the sex of the baby is completely outside of our control. Yesterday I caught her (the mighty 10 year old that she is) cuddling a baby doll in her arms and carrying it gently up the stairs. I said nothing, but she bashfully smiled under my bemused regard and went on her way.
There are many options for adopting a child. The one that seems to be the "easiest" is to go with an international adoption. This approach, however, is prohibitively expensive for us.
A second option is to go through Los Angeles county's adoption services. This approach, however, is coupled with the courts system, which implies that any baby that we might get would likely come from an abusive or drug-exposed home. In addition, the county is more interested in keeping families together than in placing adoptive children. To make matters worse, the training and "certification" programs are designed around first-time parents and are very lengthy and intrusive. We already have a family that needs my wife and I here in the home, not spending many weekends off at some ineffectual training course. Neither are we interested in a "special needs" child (fault us in this regards, if you must). The uncertainties in the court process, however, was the killer for us -- we don't want to have a baby in our home for up to two years, only to have it yanked as some judge decides to return it to the birth mother.
A third option is to use LDS Family Services, as my wife's brother did over a decade ago. We began looking into this and were refused help due to a recent policy change that declines to provide services to couples that have more than two children. So much for that. However, they did say that they will help us with the legal stuff if we were to find our own adoptive mother.
(An aside: The policy actually reads that they won't provide services to couples who have more than two biological children. We grumbled at the fact that we noted prospective adoptive couples on their website who have mixed biological and adopted children who number more than two, and it was clarified for us that the policy is for all children, biological or adoptive, and that those couples on the website who have more than two are "grandfathered" in -- implying that they've been waiting for a long time to adopt another child.)
Which brings us to option four, which is to find our own adoptive mother. This is the path that we've elected to take. It has only a small chance of success, but we figure that given everything else, it's the best option for our little family. To that end, we've begun reaching out to everybody we know. Some years ago, I joined Facebook as an experiment to see how many people I could friend from my past ... I was stunned by the magnitude of my results, but now find that my connection to all those people is a great and wonderful thing. We'll see if it works out.
The crazy and ironic thing about this whole adoption thing, which is intended to be a virtuous and noble (albeit somewhat selfish) endeavor, is that we seek to take advantage of somebody's misfortune. We're looking for a young woman (though we'll take a not-so-young woman, too!) who finds herself pregnant without desiring to be so (though we'll take a woman who simply likes to be pregnant, too!).
Despite the circumstances of this woman's life, we hope that this woman will respect and love her unborn child enough to care properly for herself so that when the baby is born, it will be healthy and strong, even though this birth mother would not be the one to benefit from the effort it takes to do so.
We equally hope that this mother might see within my family a place where her child can be placed with confidence that it will be cherished and appreciated, loved and adored. We also recognize, however, that emotional attachment is not everything, and we would hope that this mother would also recognize that my home is one that is safe and secure, where I am able to provide the resources to rear her child with all the appropriate educational, medical, financial, and social opportunities that can enable a happy childhood and a stable environment in which to grow into a responsible adult.
It's a lot to ask. We ask for a mother to simply give her child to us. In return, we promise to take care of her baby to the best of our abilities and with all our resources as if the baby was one of our own. This promise, this covenant, is one we take with the utmost of seriousness, yet we are so powerless to bring it to fruition.
So we wait. And we talk to people. And we post blog entries like this one, and Facebook statii, and make phone calls, and talk to people at work and at church and in the supermarket and on the street with the neighborhood kids and, well, you get the picture. We've set up a blog dedicated specifically to a prospective birth mother, that she may get to know our family a little and see a little about what we're about. Check it out: http://royandangel.blogspot.com. We've even set up an email where contact can be made specifically on this topic: royandangel@yahoo.com.
So, please, if you know of somebody who might be in a position to let their child be adopted, please pass a note on to her. We would be most appreciative. Until then, the wait continues ...
Monday, October 3, 2011
Life Changes
I haven't written in this space for a while because, well, I've been busy. It's clear that sometimes actually living life prevents you from documenting it. That said, this post is a quick run-down on what I've been doing, for all those who have been holding their breath:
- I went to Utah to visit with the in-laws for my wife's parent's 50th wedding anniversary. If you recall, we went to see my parents for their 50th wedding anniversary earlier in the year. To be blessed with those examples of marital fidelity from not one, but both sides of the family is a real treat, and I wish I could express to everybody what an amazing accomplishment I find that to be. In today's world where everything seems temporary, it's wonderful to see that some people still know what it means to make a promise, and keep it, forever.
- I went to Goddard Space Flight Center in Greenbelt, MD, again -- this time for a peer review that served as a pre-meeting for a design review that has now been moved to the new year. A "pre-review" is a "pre-meeting". Yeah, we laugh at Dilbert where I work, but it is painfully reflective of the truth sometimes.
- I went to ESA's Spacecraft Operations Center (ESOC) in Darmstadt, Germany, again - this time for a one-day "technical interchange meeting" on lots of topics we needed to address. I went with only one other fellow, so it was a whirlwind trip, but it was well-worth it. We got a lot done.
- We took a vacation and went to the beach during one our kid's fall break. We went up to El Capitan State Beach and camped out. We hauled the beach gear and the bicycles and the kayak, somehow managing to cram it all into and on our van; and ended up only using the first two. Even so, we had a wonderful time, even though the freight train that blew its horn and seemed to come through our tent at 2 am still makes me a little twitchy when I think about it.
- We've installed the latest version of the software for which I'm the task lead at work, which was quite a feat given that I've been out of town the bulk of the last month.
- Our oldest son is in the process of getting braces.
- My two younger children are participating in soccer, and between practices three times a week and games on Saturday, we're BUSY.
- My wife and I have decided we'd like to adopt another child. I'll post more on this later, but see here for the relevant blog.
- I conferred the Aaronic Priesthood on my oldest son and ordained him to the office of a deacon. He's very excited about being with the bigger boys, and he is maturing into quite the young man (in fits and starts).
Sunday, September 4, 2011
Another Thing to Make One Happy
My six-year-old is downstairs singing "I'm Trying to Be Like Jesus", occasionally interrupting that with car vrooming sounds from his toy cars.
Friday, September 2, 2011
On Jealousy
The other day I was perusing Facebook killing a few minutes (because there's really no added value to your life when you're on Facebook ...) when I saw a post by somebody who was so excited to be going on a cruise. This post followed other posts by and pictures of this person and this person's family spending gobs of time boating and off-roading. When I saw this post I was struck with a very sharp feeling of jealousy of this person. This took me by surprise and disturbed me greatly (hence this blog post), because I'm not a person who is prone to jealousy. My life is really quite good, and I generally want for nothing.
Even so, over the past few days, I've been thinking about this quite a bit, and trying to reconcile my jealousy, which hasn't gone away, with my own life. Why is it that this person, who isn't any better than me (see? I have a very well-developed sense of self-importance, so this jealousy is not derived from low self-esteem or self-worth ...), able to have all this free time and money to do these expensive and time-consuming things?
This is difficult for me to answer and I can only guess at the nature of this person's finances, so I have been forced to turn the question around: How is it that I do not have all this free time and money to do those kinds of expensive and time-consuming things? This question is much easier for me to answer. I work hard for the money I earn, and even if I had gobs of extra money, I don't think I'd choose to spend it that way; and, well, I work and when I do have free time, I choose to spend it visiting with family and going on other more pointed family vacations (see here for this summer's travels).
So, why is that I still feel so much jealousy when I wouldn't choose to spend my time and money doing what this person does, even if I had more time and more money? I'm not really sure, but it probably has something to do with how I'm wired. I have always want more out of life. I never feel like I have enough time to do all the things I want to do, and, much to my dismay, I often find I simply don't have the strength or brain-power to well-utilize the time I do have. It's a terrible conundrum.
This whole experience reminds me of a cartoon I once saw, which I was able to find:
So I'm in a tricky spot. How can I suppress this jealousy? Just internalize it and let it eat away at me? Or ... and perhaps this is WAY better ... I should try to convince this person to take me on their next vacation ... and pay for it, too.
Is there a third option?!
Even so, over the past few days, I've been thinking about this quite a bit, and trying to reconcile my jealousy, which hasn't gone away, with my own life. Why is it that this person, who isn't any better than me (see? I have a very well-developed sense of self-importance, so this jealousy is not derived from low self-esteem or self-worth ...), able to have all this free time and money to do these expensive and time-consuming things?
This is difficult for me to answer and I can only guess at the nature of this person's finances, so I have been forced to turn the question around: How is it that I do not have all this free time and money to do those kinds of expensive and time-consuming things? This question is much easier for me to answer. I work hard for the money I earn, and even if I had gobs of extra money, I don't think I'd choose to spend it that way; and, well, I work and when I do have free time, I choose to spend it visiting with family and going on other more pointed family vacations (see here for this summer's travels).
So, why is that I still feel so much jealousy when I wouldn't choose to spend my time and money doing what this person does, even if I had more time and more money? I'm not really sure, but it probably has something to do with how I'm wired. I have always want more out of life. I never feel like I have enough time to do all the things I want to do, and, much to my dismay, I often find I simply don't have the strength or brain-power to well-utilize the time I do have. It's a terrible conundrum.
This whole experience reminds me of a cartoon I once saw, which I was able to find:
So I'm in a tricky spot. How can I suppress this jealousy? Just internalize it and let it eat away at me? Or ... and perhaps this is WAY better ... I should try to convince this person to take me on their next vacation ... and pay for it, too.
Is there a third option?!
Thursday, September 1, 2011
On Manual Labor
Last night was the 5th Wednesday in the month of August. Our ward has a tradition of allocating that evening for the young men and young women to provide service to people of the Bishop's choosing. All the youth from ages 12 to 18 typically attend and are sent out to spend roughly half an hour helping one or more families in the ward, often those who are sick or otherwise infirm.
Last night, I went with two other adult leaders, four boys, and two girls; the youth were all between the ages of 14 and 16. We went over to one man's house (who has recently been quite ill) in order to do some yard work for him. When we arrived, this man had already meticulously done more than half the work, and the lawn mower and an edge trimmer were already out and ready to go. Pretty much all that needed to be finished was the edging of the front lawn, the mowing of the front lawn, and a few branches trimmed off a tree in the front yard.
Frankly, I was NOT impressed with the youth. I understand that young people of every era aren't typically voluntary. But they all knew why we were there -- we were there to help in any way that we could. Instead, they goofed off most of the time, being silly with each other, until the adult leaders actively prodded them with an instruction to do something specific. Sometimes, even after a direct instruction, the youth would resist doing what they'd been asked, making an excuse of some kind or simply not responding.
Most infuriating was one boy who stood and stared at me as I instructed him to go get the leaf blower from the man who we were there to help and to do what he was doing. Another sad example was when one of the girls, when asked to use the edger and after I had shown her how to use it, told me she couldn't do it because she's a girl. Really?!
With six able bodies, we should've been done in about ten minutes. Instead, it took us the full half hour to prod these children to do the job.
Only one of the boys had actually used a lawn mower before. Only one! I know for a fact that every teenager that was there lives in a house with a yard, which implies that either their parents don't have them help with the outdoor work, or their parents hire gardeners. I can't fault the parents for using their probably hard-earned resources to pay for a gardener, but sometimes I wonder if we (and I include myself here) often do what is easy, rather than what is right. It is certainly easier to hire a gardener. It is certainly easier to do the work ourselves so that it gets done promptly and the way we want it done. Nevertheless, I feel that parents do their children a great disservice when they fail to provide them with opportunities to do some of this menial labor around their own homes. Last night crisply illustrated the point for me.
Now don't get me wrong. Usually, I'm quite impressed by the moral character and the spiritual strength of these youth, but last night, I was downright disgusted by their laziness and ineptitude. It seems to me that these youth do not have an understanding of the value of manual work, nor did they carry with them the spirit of volunteerism that is held by people who provide service to others. I could make excuses for the youth, citing how busy they are with school and extracurricular activities and church responsibilities, but I'm not going to, because there was really no excuse for the behavior I saw last night.
Personally, my wife and I have had a long-standing policy that the kids help with the chores in and around the house. My 11-year-old son actually mows the lawn now, and does a fine job of it, too -- and he is a full 4 years junior to most of the youth that were there last night. Am I perfect in this regards? Not on your life, but at least I'm making sure he gets exposed to hard work in the sun and the heat, and learning the value of hard work.
So, parents out there, my challenge to you: let your gardener go and get your teenagers to mow the lawn. It won't result in perfect lines in your lawn and beautiful edges, but it may just result in a more perfect child.
Last night, I went with two other adult leaders, four boys, and two girls; the youth were all between the ages of 14 and 16. We went over to one man's house (who has recently been quite ill) in order to do some yard work for him. When we arrived, this man had already meticulously done more than half the work, and the lawn mower and an edge trimmer were already out and ready to go. Pretty much all that needed to be finished was the edging of the front lawn, the mowing of the front lawn, and a few branches trimmed off a tree in the front yard.
Frankly, I was NOT impressed with the youth. I understand that young people of every era aren't typically voluntary. But they all knew why we were there -- we were there to help in any way that we could. Instead, they goofed off most of the time, being silly with each other, until the adult leaders actively prodded them with an instruction to do something specific. Sometimes, even after a direct instruction, the youth would resist doing what they'd been asked, making an excuse of some kind or simply not responding.
Most infuriating was one boy who stood and stared at me as I instructed him to go get the leaf blower from the man who we were there to help and to do what he was doing. Another sad example was when one of the girls, when asked to use the edger and after I had shown her how to use it, told me she couldn't do it because she's a girl. Really?!
With six able bodies, we should've been done in about ten minutes. Instead, it took us the full half hour to prod these children to do the job.
Only one of the boys had actually used a lawn mower before. Only one! I know for a fact that every teenager that was there lives in a house with a yard, which implies that either their parents don't have them help with the outdoor work, or their parents hire gardeners. I can't fault the parents for using their probably hard-earned resources to pay for a gardener, but sometimes I wonder if we (and I include myself here) often do what is easy, rather than what is right. It is certainly easier to hire a gardener. It is certainly easier to do the work ourselves so that it gets done promptly and the way we want it done. Nevertheless, I feel that parents do their children a great disservice when they fail to provide them with opportunities to do some of this menial labor around their own homes. Last night crisply illustrated the point for me.
Now don't get me wrong. Usually, I'm quite impressed by the moral character and the spiritual strength of these youth, but last night, I was downright disgusted by their laziness and ineptitude. It seems to me that these youth do not have an understanding of the value of manual work, nor did they carry with them the spirit of volunteerism that is held by people who provide service to others. I could make excuses for the youth, citing how busy they are with school and extracurricular activities and church responsibilities, but I'm not going to, because there was really no excuse for the behavior I saw last night.
Personally, my wife and I have had a long-standing policy that the kids help with the chores in and around the house. My 11-year-old son actually mows the lawn now, and does a fine job of it, too -- and he is a full 4 years junior to most of the youth that were there last night. Am I perfect in this regards? Not on your life, but at least I'm making sure he gets exposed to hard work in the sun and the heat, and learning the value of hard work.
So, parents out there, my challenge to you: let your gardener go and get your teenagers to mow the lawn. It won't result in perfect lines in your lawn and beautiful edges, but it may just result in a more perfect child.
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